The Six Elemental by Ali House

How (NOT) To Write A Blog Post

Step 1)  Think of a topic and start writing.

Step 2)  Realize half-way through that you don’t like this topic as much as you thought you did.

Step 3)  Think of new topic and start writing.

Step 4)  Wonder if maybe the first topic was better and consider returning to it.

Step 5)  Wonder if maybe there’s a third topic out there that’s even better than the previous two*.

Step 6)  Wonder how you got that bruise on your leg – was it a chair arm? Corner of a table? It feels like it’s going to be a bad one…

Step 7)  Consider writing the topic that’s been in the back of your mind, then realize that you don’t have time to get into it as much as you want, so put it back on the shelf where you’ll probably forget about it again.

Step 8)  Get a glass of water, then promptly feel bad about wasting time wandering around when you should be writing.

Step 9)  Wonder if maybe you should tease that you’re currently writing a short story/novella set in New Earth, but take a pass because you can’t think of any way to turn that into a full blog post.

Step 10)  Wonder if maybe you should hype Chillers From the Rock, since they’re still accepting submissions, and time goes faster than you think it will so it’s best to get started ASAP.

Step 11)  Start writing a fourth topic completely unrelated to any other topic you’ve previously thought about.

Step 12)  Look at the clock. It’s getting late…

Step 13)  Pet the cat that just crawled in your lap (he rarely does this, so you have to savor the moment, even if it’s inconvenient timing).

Step 14)  Finish the post; check it over to make sure it makes sense.

Step 15)  Post it and congratulate yourself!

Step 16)  Swear that you’ll start next month’s blog post sooner**.

_______

*Literally my process every time. I have a ton of half-finished posts saved in a document.

**You probably won’t. C’est la vie.

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